Top 5 Poorly Received Movies I Love

To quote Dirty Harry: "Opinions are like assholes; everyone's got one." Or, if you wanna be cliched or "not obscene" (both overrated), "Everyone's entitled to their own opinion." Either way, the truth of the matter is that everyone has and is allowed to have opinions. To make decisions and judgments by themselves and for themselves. So in the viewpoint of film critique, it is well-known that each individual critic can either love or hate a film. Nobody ever agrees with each other 100%*.

(*Except, of course, in the case of Samuel L. Jackson; all mere mortals just gotta agree with that badass, even if he says he likes Leprechaun, or he'll strike down upon them with great vengeance and furious anger.)

He's a cloud-laying motherfucker, motherfucker!

Now while I myself am not a professional critic, I do write several reviews, on both here and Rotten Tomatoes, and therefore I consider myself at least an unofficial dabbler into cinema critique. And so like the "for reals" film critics (and, as demonstrated from the two quotes above, everybody) I have my own set of opinions jeered towards certain cinematic projects. In other words: I like movies others hate.

This can honestly be frustrating sometimes; you're reading about a movie you like, and see countless amounts of criticism from critics and the public, while you find yourself unable to see the flaws they notice, or if you do, you can't find it in yourself to judge the whole movie on them. Still, though, I don't particularly give a damn when others disagree with my views on a film, and so I stick by my opinions of it. And that's what this specific post is all about: Folks, I present to you my list of the Top 5 Poorly Received Movies I Love.

5. Space Jam (1996)

"...And that's where babies come from, Daffy."

Back when VHS's were still, ya know, actually used, I recall always going down to the library and renting out Space Jam when I was bored and had nothing to watch. I've never truly understood what people dislike about this film: in my opinion, it's fun, goofy, and actually sometimes quite funny. Okay, Michael Jordan's dishing out an almost Shaq-in-Kazaam-level performance of blandness, and there's some obnoxious product placement, but when you look passed that, there's a hell of a lot to enjoy from this flick.

The film's under-the-radar barbs and sly, tongue-in-cheek (and very accurate) portrayal of Michael Jordan's post-basketball "career" lead for a whole mess of fun and laughter. It's still a surprise to me today how much enjoyment I can squeeze from this movie, and how funny it can honestly be. The rubber-house animation is polished with excellent voice performances from the likes of Billy West, Dee Baker, etc., and of course the antics of the Looney Tunes are always a blast. And like I said, the depiction of Michael Jordan's life in the live-action scenes are surprisingly (but pleasingly) entertaining. Plus, that song is so damn catchy...

This is a really fun--and sometimes funny--movie, and I still can't seem to see what people dislike about it. Tomatometer rating: 36%

4. Ninja Assassin (2009)

"DAMN PIRATES!"

The minute I saw the trailer for this film I knew it was gonna be a badass popcorn flick filled with badass ninjas doing badass ninja stuff. In other words, badass. I was effectively sold when one trailer featured one of the coolest taglines I think cinema has ever given us: "One ninja was harmed in the making of this movie. The rest were killed."

Apparently, though, film critics didn't see the film for the badass romp that it was, and gave it poor reviews, chastising it for being "overly serious." But that's where it boggles me: critics will always complain that popcorn films lack any and all substance, but when a popcorn flick actually puts depth and drama into it, they complain. What the hell? What's with the double standard, movie critics? 

That being said, Ninja Assassin is a movie I love in a similar fashion to my love of Space Jam; it's just really, really fun to watch. I was cheering and hooting my way through this movie when I first saw it on a (completely legally obtained) burned DVD at home, loving every ridiculously violent death scene, every martial arts feat performed by Rizu (played brilliantly by the always enjoyable [and badass] Rain), every sly one-liner, and every emotionally fulfilling character arc. You may laugh when I say that last bit, but the movie honestly does contain a surprising amount of depth; you care for the characters, and you really want Rizu to succeed.

Brilliantly bloody, badass, and fun, this popcorn flick is also a love of mine because it contains a surprising amount of depth and really likable (and, yeah, badass) characters. And did I mention how badass it was? Tomatometer rating: 25%.

3. The Man in the Iron Mask (1998)

A scene from an unproduced The Mask prequel?

Here's another case of that double standard film critics demonstrated above. 1998's The Man in the Iron Mask (a remake of the 1939 movie of the same name) was poorly received upon it's release because it turned out not to be a swashbuckling popcorn flick that they all expected it to be. Or at least, it turned out be more than that. The film has depth, riveting performances, and thrilling action, but apparently, the critics didn't like that.

The cast assembled in this piece is extraordinary. Leading the brilliant line-up is Leonardo DiCaprio, who plays both the titular "Man in the Iron Mask", Phillipe, and his twin brother, King Louis XIV. The two are on opposite sides of the moral spectrum, with Phillipe being the compassionate, honest man, and Louis being the militaristic bastard with no respect for anyone but himself. Meanwhile, the now-retired Three (or, really, Four) Musketeers are portrayed by Jeremy Irons, Gabriel Brynes, Gerard Depardieu, and John Malkovich.

Malkovich Malkovich? Malkovich Malkovich.

Each of these performances are stellar, particularly DiCaprio (who, by playing for two, is producing double his usual excellence) and Depardieu, whose drunken, sexual antics are hysterical. There's also this really powerful atmosphere that caries this film throughout, with strong thematic elements on brotherhood, honor, and loyalty.

Why critics would dislike a film featuring strong performances, depth, and compelling action thrown in baffles me to this day, but I know I do, and always will, love The Man in the Iron Mask. Tomatometer rating: 31%.

2. Madagascar (2005)

My God: It's the '08 Presidential Election!

Another seriously baffling one on display here: Madagascar. Critics disliked this film for being "hit-and-miss", but they couldn't be more wrong. Every joke in this movie is pitch-perfect hilarity. Like I said in my Picking On... post for DreamWorks Animation, I actually find Madagascar superior to both Shrek and Shrek 2, which are not only considered DreamWorks' finest hours, but also two of the greatest animated films ever produced.

"...Heavy."

Like I said, what makes this film so great is how hysterical it is. The laughs in this film are constant, whether they're derived from wordplay, sight gags, the dialogue, or the hilarious interplay between the brilliant voice cast (which features especially strong voice-over performances from Ben Stiller and David Schwimmer). Even the somewhat-cheap animal/zoo jokes and puns littered throughout the movie makes it's own, allowing for a plethora of hilarity.

Meanwhile, the animation in outstanding. Purposely blocky and cartoonish, yet somehow also smooth and rounded, it's like if the animation for Fanboy and Chum Chum or the CGI-Timmy scenes during Nick's Jimmy/Timmy Power Hour weren't complete garbage. Aside from strong visuals and a wildly entertaining screenplay, the film also features a strong story dependent on the strength of its characters.

The film's consistently hilarious, the characters are well-written, the animation's outstanding; film critics must've been drunk when they labeled this underrated classic a "hit-or-miss" farce. Tomatometer rating: 55%.

1. Across the Universe (2007)

Funny, I looked the same when I read the reviews for this movie.

And now, for the big one. Ladies and germs, here it is: Across the Universe. This is not only the number one Poorly Received Movies I Love, it's also one of my favorite films of all time and considered one of the prime example of "Love-it-or-Hate-it" in cinema of recent years.

Let's start, I believe, with what critics complained about: as Rotten Tomatoes writes, the detractors declared it a "cliched love story" with "uninteresting characters". Another thing I've noticed people criticize it for are its apparently nonsensical nature with far to many Big Lipped Alligator Moments to allow for an easy understanding of the goings-on of the movie's (excuse my pun) universe.

In reality, though, Across the Universe is an overwhelmingly beautifully constructed musical drama that delivers on every level. For those who don't know, it is a love story built around the iconic music of the greatest artists who ever lived, The Beatles. Over thirty of their songs are sung throughout it, and even more are referenced, either through the dialouge, or through the characters. And since The Beatles' music (particularly in their early With The Beatles-A Hard Day's Night phase) is largely devoted to young love, the music crafts the story of a poignant romance in the '60s at the heat of the Vietnam War.

Julie Taymor directed this movie and it shows; Taymor has become recognized far and wide for producing beautiful, awe-inspiring visuals and allowing them to be tell a story in themselves. With Taymor, Across the Universe becomes 133 minutes of mindblowing visuals and compelling beauty. The screenplay creates a cast of wonderfully written characters, from the complicated, charming Jude, to the rebellious slacker Max, to the Jimi Hendrix-escue JoJo. The hardships, the good times, the changes, these characters face and deal with are told with passion and emotion, and you go through everything alongside them.

'Nam tends to have this effect on people.

The performances in this movie are stellar, particularly from Jim Sturgess as Jude and Joe Anderson as Max, whose evolution from a slacker to a physically-and-emotionally scarred war veteran is emotionally visceral and carries a hell of a lot of weight (oh, and whoever can guess what song that's a reference to will get +100 Beatlemania points). The supporting characters are all rather compelling, and Lucy's character is the perfect choice for references to the anti-war protests of the era and of course John Lennon's own prominent promotions of peace (yeah for alliteration!)

Thankfully, to couple with their great performances, the actors all have amazing singing voices. Every cover in this movie is outstanding, especially Anderson's depressing rendition of "Happiness Is A Warm Gun" and Dana Fuchs' powerful cover of "Helter Sketler." I think the only one in the film I'm not particularly fond of is T.V. Carpio's version of "I Wanna Hold Your Hand". It's not that it's poorly sung, because Carpio actually does a great job, it's just I've always been frustrated when people interpret "I Wanna Hold Your Hand" as some soulful reflection on restrained or restricted love, when it's really just a cheerful ballad about young love in its purest.

Across the Universe is an emotional, powerful experience filled with mind-blowing visuals and some damn fine performances. The music of The Beatles and the atmosphere of the era allows for the film to soar past the normal musical-romance genre, and becomes more of a drama about love, peace, and life then a standard romantic story. Critics hated it for whatever reason (sans Roger Ebert, God Bless Him), but I sure as hell loved it. And, judging by it's 84% rating on RT's community section, I'm not the only one who thought critics made a big mistake here. Tomatometer rating: 53%.

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So there you have it, my list of the Top 5 Poorly Received Films I Love. If you agree, that's great, and if not, then good on, 'cause like I said, everyone is allowed their own opinions. Plus, without differing opinions, then everyone ends up being the same. Now that would be something I think we can all agree would suck.